How Do Your Clients Want to be Remembered?

Bob Mauterstock, CFP, ChFc, CLTC

Many of us do estate planning for our older clients. We make presentations to them focusing on reducing estate taxes and maximizing the amounts they can transfer to their heirs. We often use flow charts to show them that if they don’t make certain changes to their estate plans, their assets will shrink by 45-50% and their heirs will have to pay millions of dollars in taxes at their death. We assume that this approach will motivate these clients to take action.

But do we ever get into serious conversations with them about what is really important? Is it all about saving taxes and giving their children and grandchildren more money? Or are there issues that are more meaningful?

David Solie, in his book How To Say It To Seniors, learned that two things dominate the thinking of seniors. First, they want to stay in control of their lives as long as possible. Second, they want to discover their legacy—how they will be remembered after they are gone. Control seems to slip away from them each day as they start to deal with health issues. They become aware that they must learn to let go, and so they begin to review their lives, look at what has happened over the years, and assign meaning to these events. This “Life Review” continues almost daily. It is a relentless conscious and unconscious process that they are immersed in for the rest of their lives.

The Allianz Life Insurance Company conducted a study and interviewed more than 2,600 baby boomers and their parents. They found that both were very willing to focus on the legacy the parents would leave behind but were unwilling to talk about inheritance. 70% of both groups said that the parent’s legacy was more important than any inheritance. So, why are we spending all of our time talking about how much more the kids will inherit if we create the right estate plan? Is this the right approach?

Here is another situation where we must shift from return on investment to return on life. We get so caught up in the dramatic tax savings that simple strategies can provide, we often overlook the more important life issues they face. How do we shift this conversation to what is important? I suggest that the next time you sit down with a client to discuss their estate plan, don’t begin with a discussion of their assets and liabilities, marital and non-marital trusts and tax credits. Sit back and ask questions like, “How do you want your great grandchildren to remember you?” Then be prepared to listen.

I’ll never forget when I met with a retired doctor and his wife to review their estate plan. I showed them that by making some simple changes to their plan, we could reduce their potential estate tax liability by over a million dollars. I couldn’t understand why the doctor wasn’t excited. His wife turned to me and remarked, “Bob’s not so worried about saving taxes. He is more concerned that our son, Dan is taken care of.” I then learned that Dan had had a very serious motorcycle accident and sustained a brain injury that would limit his mental capacity for the rest of his life. He was living in a group home and Dad checked on him every week to make sure that everything was OK.

Dad wanted to make sure that someone would be there to look after Dan when he and his wife were gone. He wanted to make sure that financially and logistically Dan would be secure for the rest of his life. That is what he wanted his estate plan to do.

Allianz Life suggests you position yourself to become your older clients’ “Legacy Adviser” and offer them “Legacy Planning.” They state that “traditional estate planning emphasizes success in the temporal world, but legacy planning focuses on the enduring significance of human relationships.” They do not consider this approach a gimmick but a shift in the focus of advisers. You could easily substitute our philosophy at the Financial Life Planning Institute for Allianz’s statement. Return on Life Planning replaces the focus on numbers with the focus on relationships.

David Solie considers himself a “Legacy Coach”, a person with a specific set of skills that facilitates senior adults in their search for the ways they wish to be remembered, their primary end of life task.

Build into your conversations with your senior clients a discussion of their values and life lessons. What values would you like to see continued throughout your family’s generations? What are the important principles that guide your family? Is there a specific lesson or teaching that you would like to impart to future generations? Are there contributions to society that you have made for which you would like to be remembered?

Encourage them to share family stories with you by asking questions like: What is your favorite family story? Has anyone documented it? What family history would you like to see passed down through the generations?

As Solie says, “Encourage your client to complete a Life Review to discover the unique footprint that they will leave behind and wish to be remembered by.” This approach will convert your dry estate plan into a meaningful legacy plan.  And you will be able to call yourself a true Return on Life Adviser.

Bob Mauterstock, CFP, ChFc, CLTC is a recognized expert in the areas of succession planning, retirement income planning, and long-term care planning. Bob has been a financial advisor to hundreds of families over the last 30 years and has helped them achieve the move from return on investment to return on life. Bob is the author of the ground-breaking book, Can We Talk?  A Financial Guide for Baby Boomers Assisting Their Elderly Parents. Contact Bob at RMauterstock@yahoo.com or (508) 246-7564.

FOR BROKER/DEALER USE ONLY. NOT FOR USE WITH THE PUBLIC